Dude, or Douchebag: Mr. Green Vehicle

Mama loves me the environment.

Mama loves me some cleaner air. Mama also loves less dependency on foreign oil, shrinking the carbon footprint and preserving our natural resources, blah blah blah.  But guess what Mama doesn’t love? People who pollute our roads with bad driving, ugly cars and entitlement.  Damn tootin’.

So bravo to you Doking, love that XD– super cute, super cool. You are a dude:

And although you’re the Audi 5000 of the 21st century–overpriced, not pretty and disturbingly flammable–I still love you, Mr. Chevy Volt.

But, hey Mr. Prius V, you might get 44 miles to the gallon, but I’m pretty sure that doesn’t give you the right to do this:

Two hot blondes locked in your car without a cracked window?  Not cool, douchebag.

But this is the one that really gets me. You know when people hate luxury car drivers and think “they bought the road when they bought that BMW, Lexus, etc.”? How about parking spaces too?

Case in point, this guy.  Look at me–I bought a Leaf– the world’s ugliest electric vehicle! And not only am I going to park directly over the sign saying “Coda Parking Only”, I’m going to grab a pizza and eat it in my car while I read “The New Yorker” on my iPad.

I kid you not. I risked life and limb and actually spied on this tree hugging loser– anything for you, dear reader.  Hey Mr Blue Leaf, you may be intellectual, environmentally friendly and admirably thrifty, but you’re still a douchebag.