Love Letters

Bitchin’ Camaro

It takes a strong woman to admit when you’re wrong. And Mr. Camaro, I’ve been wrong about you.  But you gotta understand–growing up, Camaros were driven by, well, Guidos and Dirtbags. (If you’re not from the East Coast, you may...

Vantastic!

For too long now, the van has been, well, mini. Or Scooby:         Or Barbie:               But a lot of us grew up with a van that did stuff like this:...

In Defense of The Gas Guzzler

Smaller! Lighter! More fuel-efficient! Yay! I’m so sick of fuel-efficient cars, I could barf. I mean, I get it– smog blows, no one wants a hole in the ozone and gas is $5 a gallon. We gotta do something.  But...

How You Doin’, El Camino?

It’s happened to all of us.  Somewhere random, like a grocery store, restaurant or gym, you get confronted by someone– someone mysteriously attractive– claiming that they know you from high school. “It’s me, Danny! From the computer lab?” and you...

The Diane Keaton of Cars

In this land of billionaires, Bugattis and Botox, looking for a flashy car is kinda like looking for fake boobs…throw a rock and you’ll hit one.  Like my friend Garrett told me before I moved here, “BMW is the Honda...

To All The Cars I’ve Loved Before

You know when you break up with someone and it hurts.. a lot? Then, maybe a month, a week, a year later, you are forced to relive the horrific experience by seeing that person, happily involved with another person. Ug....

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