Oh, LA Auto Show– you never disappoint.
This year there was plenty of Good. Mainly in the form of German alternative fuel vehicles. My favorite was this beauty from BMW:
The i8 is so pretty, that the guy standing next to me didn’t move for a suspiciously long time. I’m pretty sure they had to clean up after that guy.
Then Mercedes gave us this wacky but wonderful futuristic fuel cell doozy:
And although it’s conventional fuel, Porsche re-invented the Cayman. Good idea, since I’ve always considered the Cayman the token lesbian of the Stuttgart fleet– no matter how sexy, how appealing, men should really just stay away. Now it’s Anne Heche– whose lesbian past is just a part of her eclectic resume. Just ask this perv, who spent about 10 minutes looking up her skirt:
If you’re looking for Bad..just go downstairs. Or as I like to call it “Tent City.” That’s because downstairs is where all of the teenage boys ogle over girls in short skirts:
(“Now, about that restraining order…”)
And bikini models diplomatically sign autographs:
(“Uh, sure I’d like my calendar signed, let be just adjust this bag of schwag in front of my junk…”)
And the cars are nothing short of hilariously bad
Al Pacino’s scowling at his douche bag of an agent who signed this release..
And not to be outdone, the WTF award goes to my old friend, the Prius. In honor of the Los Angeles Auto Show, Toyota shows us California’s best-selling car like this:
Really? The car is butt-ugly in the first place and the best you can do is show us one in frosted vomit? Come on Toyota– you could’ve covered it in gummy bears, had it painted by starving handicapped children, or covered it in bird turd in honor of the environment, but instead your marketing team came up with this! WTF?
I’m disgusted, baffled and intrigued, but most of all, I can’t wait for next year!